A Letter to my soon-to-be Granddaughter

Dear Little One,
As the first month of 2023 comes to an end, your mom sent me two happy text messages related to your February arrival.

The first shared news that your little growing body shifted and now is in the expected, heads-down position in your warm cocoon. It seems you are getting ready to make your out-of-the-womb appearance.

The second news came as a photo. It showed such loving effort by your parents and your mom’s best friend, Adela, who came for a visit ahead of your arrival. She purposefully chose this moment to offer help getting your nursery all set up. In the photo, your white crib filled the foreground. It is ready to offer you a comfy place to nap. Adela and Bridgit followed all the step-by-step Ikea picture-directions and after many righty-tighty moves using allen wrenches, your crib is set for your arrival.

Above the crib, they placed colorful hearts and a large rainbow decal in various shades of peach and teal. And just above the decals, they hung bunting. A repeated pattern of beige, white and orange triangles hangs, just like that which hung at your parent’s wedding.

Plus, two surprises await you in your crib. Two stuffed animal friends – a panda and a dinosaur. I wonder what you will name them. Will the three of you become fast friends?

Best of all, a warm blanket hangs on your crib. Your Great-Nana crocheted it with her 87-year old hands, using matching shades of teal and white yarn. It is sure to keep you warm as soon as you arrive.

In sixteen days, it will be Valentine’s Day. This is a day celebrated by saying “I love you” with cards and candy and flowers, all across the globe. It is also the day your Grandpa’s mother celebrated her birthday. And best of all, it is YOUR proposed due date!

The two text messages I received from your mom this week show how much you are loved. I am excited you are in position and ready . I am equally exicted that once you arrive, your Amsterdam bright and happy nursery is ready to embrace you like a warm hug. You are one lucky little lady. Whether you arrive on the 14th or on another day soon, your earthly home is ready for you.
Lots of love,
Grandma

October

October…month to celebrate my birth (59 years ago)

October…month to remember my dad’s passing (34 years ago)

October…month to celebrate my daughter’s birth (34 years ago)

October…month of my brother’s wedding (30 years ago)

Ocotber…month of his son / my nephew’s wedding (4 days ago)

October…a colorful time

Orange and red and yellows appear

Greens and blues fade as the cool breeze blows

October…month of transitions

from womb to birth

from single life to married life

from life well-lived here on earth to death

October…a colorful changing time

And now my October birthday baby is expecting!!!

#ProudAunt

My Daughter’s Wedding / #ProudMother

My daughter, Bridgit, and her partner, Charlie, recently gathered family and friends in Savannah, GA and on the afternoon of May 1st, they stood under an immense oak tree covered in spanish moss and said, “We do” after the officients (their siblings) took turns reading their five personally-written vows.

The night before this joyful event, Bridgit and Charlie invited all their wedding guest to gather at a local Savannah distillery for the “Welcome Party”. It was important for them to orchestrate many opportunities for their family and friends to spend time together because over the past several months, due to Covid, together time mostly involved screens. (In fact, many guests were meeting in Savannah in-person for the first). During the party, Brian and I gladly offered toasts. Brian went first, sharing a few small moments from Bridigt’s early years (yes, a few tears were shed by all) and then I went. Click to read if interested.

Brian’s Toast
Sally’s Toast

The following day, guests arrived via the Savannah Trolley and Bridgit and Charlie arrived by horse-drawn carriage. First, guests mingled and played lawn games – bocce, croquet, giant jenga. And after an hour, all were asked to take a seat under the live oak tree for the ceremony. First, three adorable flower-girls, dressed as princesses, walked across the field and down the aisle as the song “Happy Feet” played. The seated friends and family clapped and sang along as the little nymph-looking girls reached into their baskets and dropped a rose-petal trail for Bridigt and Charlie to walk upon.

Then the music changed to something that sounded familiar but I couldn’t place it immediately. “It’s the West Wing theme song!” a voice in the crowd whispered and I thought, “how perfect”. Both Bridgit and Charlie didn’t just watch this series but were inspired by the Sorkin-idealist-democracy portrayed on TV and spent many years working for progressive candidates. It was finally their work with the DNC to elect Biden that allowed them to cross paths, meet and fall in love. Of course, they were walking down the aisle together to this TV-theme song. This gathering was so them. They stood under a ginormous oak tree glittering with Spanish moss and joined hands. Charlie’s brothers, Joe and Hank, placed colorful braided cords over their hands as Bridgit’s sister, Anne explained this chosen ritual of handfasting.

Bridgit and Charlie explain it best in their online wedding program:
Handfasting – OUR CHOSEN UNITY RITUAL
In a nod to May Day, Beltane and our shared Irish heritage, we chose handfasting as our unity ritual—literally tying the knot! Handfasting is an ancient Celtic ritual in which the hands are tied together to symbolize the binding of two lives. We like that it is a lasting, physical representation of our commitment to each other, as well as a very egalitarian ritual. We made our handfasting cords ourselves, based on color meaning: BLUE fidelity, longevity, strength, safe journey GREEN fertility and growth, love, luck, prosperity, nurturing PINK love, happiness, unity, romance, honor, truth GOLD wisdom, prosperity, longevity BLACK pure love, wisdom, success, strength.

Once their vows were share and the knot was tied, they kissed!! All cheered and waved their miniature May Pole in celebration. Then family and friends proceeded inside and we ate, drank and danced the night away, under the twinkling lights that covered the ceiling.

I can’t think of anything that would have made this wedding weekend better. I am so grateful that Bridgit and Charlie found each other and planned such a lovely weekend in Savannah to celebrate their union with family and friends. #ProudMother

Photography by Carraway Weddings – highly recommend!!

Gatherings

Why do we gather? Priya Parker asks this question as she begins her book, The Art of Gathering. One of her answers in to welcome.

I realize as 2021 gets ready to turn its page and begin a new chapter, I have two special gatherings planned.

My first one is in Toulouse, France. Toulouse is known as the “Pink City” due to its century-old terra cotta bricks, It will be my first visit and I am imagining enjoying my breakfast of a croissant and tea in the hotel coffee shop. Then I’ll pull on my overcoat and head out to meet up with my daughter Anne and her partner, Remi. As I meet him for the first time in person, they will introduce me to their city. I am so looking forward to this December gathering.

Twenty years ago, during the month of August my husband and I explored Spain with our two girls. One evening as the sun was starting to set in Barcelona, we strolled the busy Ramblas, stopping to view the the movements of the mimes. I insisted that we touch the Mediterranean Sea and the girls raced ahead to the water’s edge. Then Brian arranged us by height and suggested we pose with our hands on our hips and snapped our photo. Maybe then we should have realized that at least one of our daughters would return to this region. Anne is only four hours to the north, teaching, exploring with Remi and caring for their new cat, Rajah! Come December, I’ll gather with them in Toulouse.

Five months later, I’ll gather in Savahana, Georgia. Know for its cobblestone squares and Spanish moss-covered oak trees. On May 1st, my oldest, Bridgit, will stand under one such tree and agree to be united with her partner, Charlie with all her family and frieds gathered.

Gatherings. I will admit, I’m a little out of practice thanks to Covid. However, I am feeling grateful my girls are giving me wonderful reasons to gather again in the coming months.

Do YOU have any plans for gathering?!

I learned of Priya Parker her and her work while listening to this episode of On Being. I used this as a Quick Write during my October ELA Department Meeting.

Keep Cup

My Writing Club (two lovely writers who participate in the March Writing Challenge as PencilOnMyBackPorch and WordJourneys) met last Wednesday and one brought along Georgia Heard’s book Writing Toward Home.

We descided to all try this exercise: Pick one word. A noun. Something concrete. Write two pages with this word in mind. Afterwards, in the margin, write the links to this word.

I picked the object that I now carry with me – my Keep Cup . Here’s where the prompt took me….

For Mother’s day, my girls had my present delivered to me. They must have been conversing across the miles and I recall Anne sending me a text a week prior asking about my favorie color. I recall my reply was “green, blue and purple but I guess blue if I can only pick one.”

As I opened the small package, I found a glass cup the size of a Starbuck’s grande drink inside and a blue plastic removable lid. I immediaely sent the girls a thank you text. Anne’s reply was, “Use it at Starbucks and be sure to ask for the reuseable-cup discount.” This made me smile as I held this small but thoughtful present called a Keep Cup. The girls know me and my routine well.

Now, I routinely carry my Keep Cup with me when I head to Starbucks in the morning. “Grande black iced tea, no sweetener,” I announce and $2.95 appears on the register. Then the minuse ten cents (-.10) appears. I smile and think how the girls’ gift is the gift that keeps on saving!

Last week and over a month since Mother’s Day, I drove and parked at my neighborhood Starbucks and realized I forgot the Keep Cup. Not wanting to return to my old habit, I actually drove back home to retrieve my Keep Cup. Each Starbuck’s purchase is one less plastic cup and one less straw added to a landfill. One small, very small gesture to reduce by reusing.

(My writing began to wander to the girls’ gift to their dad for Father’s Day…a comparision but after a paragraph, it seemed off-topic so I stopped and wrote this next…)

Reduce. Recycle. Reuse. Gestures needed for my planet. My girls are conscious of the need for such gestures. I wonder if it is doing anything at all. I am reminded of the story of the hummingbird (which PencilOnMyBackPorch shared with me last Earth Day – view video here). The hummingbird, though so small, tries to put out the fire. Action. Thanks to my girls, I’ve made it a habit to routine;y use my Keep Cup. Action.

After 2 pages, I write these links in the margin: gift, new routine, gift is saving me $, different dad gift – off topic, being sustainable

NOTE: I enjoyed this exercise. I see now that this writing could be a seed for many more stories. I really enjoyed doing this exercise in the company of my writing club. While I wrote about my Keep Cup, one picked the noun, fireplace and the other picked the noun bra. So fun to listen to their ponderings related to their chosen noun!

Do you ever “prompt write”? Maybe something to try.
Now I’m heading to Starbucks with my Keep Cup!!

Election Night, 2016

I watched Rachel Maddow interview Hillary Clinton Wednesday night on The Rachel Maddow Show on MSNBC. I was reminded that this summer, while at the TCRWP Summer August Writing Institute, I worked on a story about Election Night. I didn’t have my laptop with me then so I hand wrote it. I realized that I never added it to my blog so I decided to do that today to be my Tuesday TwoWritingTeachers blog post. #ImStillWithHer

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I voted for Hillary. From the time I was old enough to vote, I’ve always voted Democratic. To me, Democrats look out for everyone – young, old, black, white, poor, middle class. This feels fair to me, so I vote Democratic. However, I must admit that I voted for Hillary for another reason. My oldest daughter, Bridgit worked for the Hillary campaign. So, of course, out of loyalty to my daughter, I voted for her boss.

I visited Bridgit at the Brooklyn Headquarters once during the summer of 2016. Bridigt took my photo in front of the large painted “Hillary for” arrow. I rememeber adding a post-it to the hundreds on the wall. Mine said, “children – especially those attending public school”.

. 

I remember how she took me around and introduced me to lots of her co-workers. I remember telling each, “Thank you for all you are doing….keep it up…this work you are doing is too important.” And as a mom, I imagined telling my friends for years to come how Bridgit helped elect the 1st female President of the United States.

On the evening of Election Day, I sat on the couch alone. The TV was tuned to MSNBC and my phone was in my hand. I watched the US map on TV – soon states would be colored red and blue but now, all still were white.

I sent Bridgit this text:
Tuesday, Nov. 8, 7:09pm
Fingers crossed for today!!
Can’t imagine the feeling
at your office. Thankful for
ALL you have done.
Bridgit’s reply: 

A little later I texted and asked:
Tuesday, Nov. 8, 8:16pm
Where are you
tonight??!!

Bridgit’s reply:
at HQ
crunching numbers.

ME: Keep it going!
Empire State bldg and
NBC are lit up pretty
red, white, and blue
Hate all the “Too Close to Call”

Bridgit – I know
Everything is just really 
surreal right now

ME: Hang in there

Then later still, I sent this:

Tuesday, Nov. 8, 11:12pm
ME: Completely numb
Hang in there

Bridgit: I just…
What is this world
we’re living in?

The news wonks seemed confused by the election returns coming in. I’m feeling confused, too. I’m also hurting because I know my daughter is hurting and there is nothing I can do.

Instead of pressing the green speech bubble to send another text, I press the green phone receiver app, then contacts, then D, then Bridgit and I hear a ring. Then I hear it connect but don’t hear anything else.

“You OK?” I ask.

“No,” she replies. I can hear such sadness as she says this one word.

“At least VA went blue, ” I say, trying to be positive. Then we both are quiet. There is really nothing more to say. We stay quiet. Then after a bit, I say, “OK. I’m heading off to bed. So proud of you. Try to get some rest too” and I pressed the red phone receiver button and end the call.

I voted for Hillary and so did the majority of American voters. But that wasn’t enough. My state of VA went blue for Hillary and so did 18 other states but that wasn’t enough. My daughter worked 7 days a week, 14+ hours a day for 6 months at HQ in Brooklyn for the #ImWithHer campaign. But that wasn’t enough.

Losing is always hard. On Election Night, 2016 I learned losing is the worst ever when it is your child that loses and there is nothing you can do. At 12:30am, now a half-hour into Wednesday, I grabbed the remote, clicked off the TV and go to bed. Numb.

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While watching the September 13th interview by Rachel with Hillary, I learned that Hillary started a non-profit called Onward Together with the motto: “Resist, insist, persist, enlist.” After hearing about it, I made a donation because I like what the organization stands for: Onward Together is dedicated to advancing the vision that earned nearly 66 million votes in the last election. By encouraging people to organize, get involved, and run for office, Onward Together will advance progressive values and work to build a brighter future for generations to come.

I’m starting to feel less numb.

 

 

A Puzzle

My new living room coffee table looks like this right now. My oldest is hanging out with us. A few weeks ago, an Amazon package arrived on our doorstep and this puzzle was inside. “I ordered it when I saw the weather report. I thought we could work on it during the snow storm.” So a few weeks ago, she sorted to find the outer edges. Once connected (except for one piece), she then assembled the stunning pink streak of the sky and then the colorful homes of the Cinque Terra. Now the many shades of the blue sky and Mediterranean Sea need to be sorted and pieces together. Plus the grey-green rocks. Who knew my coffee table is just the right size for a 2000 piece puzzle? Who knew a 2000 piece puzzle would require such time and single-minded focus?

Why is she home? Why does she have time on her hands? She took some time off after working tirelessly in Brooklyn for a political candidate. She needed some time to comprehend the loss of the campaign. Now she is starting to feel ready for her next job. She has some irons in the fire and is just waiting for an offer. I admire her courage? persistence? confidence?….Not sure exactly what to call it – that ability to wait to say yes to a job. But not just any job. A job that she really wants. It helps that she planned well and has a large savings account to tide her over as she waits. It helps that we have a spare bedroom and easily cook for three now.

The snowstorm allowed for only one day off from school. So now, weeks later, I help add pieces to the puzzle on the weekends. She continues, in her spare time. Soon, the puzzle will be competed. Soon, she’ll take that next job. For now, I’m going to post this story on Day 25, a Saturday, and add a few more pieces to the puzzle.

Women’s International Day

Somehow, International Women’s Day snuck up on me. I was reminded the day before when I heard Alexandria Public Schools, the next-over district, announced they were closing on March 8th due to the large number of women taking the day off. Our district was considering following suit but didn’t in the end.

I was reminded when I opened my laptop and clicked on chrome and saw this on my homepage:

I was reminded when I kept seeing women wearing red and noticed I was wearing a boring black and white outfit.

I smiled when I saw that a creative person added this to the sign at my school’s restroom:

Once home after school, I asked my daughter what we should have for dinner. “If we were to get take-out, the paper listed Women-Owned restaurants. One is in Arlington.” Perfect plan, I thought! This can be my small contribution to give a shout-out to women on International Women’s Day.

Now, Arlington Kabob  restaurant’s phone number is added to my phone contacts as I plan to return again. And the women-owner kindly gave me an extra order of lentil soup for stopping in to show my support. I’m looking forward to enjoying this at lunch today as I talk up this yummy restaurant with my co-workers and check twitter to see how many more likes I get to this tweet:

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Change sprinkled with Routine

As 2017 starts, I focus on my OLW – Routine. I know I feel comfort when in routine. I know that discombobulated feeling that comes when change is demanded.  I thought about this as I reflected on my 2016 Christmas.

Tree was decorated in the living room,

not cut down after a drive out to the country, like those first few years.

Blue, green and white-flashing lights wrapped it and ornaments hung,

no hand-made ornaments received as the kids are both 20+ years old.

Most presents shipped via Harry and David and gift cards mailed

so not many presents to wrap and place under the tree

Christmas Eve meal cooked by me this time, included stuffed cabbage and egg nog

no Grandma’s house to visit  to eat Grandma’s stuffed cabbage because Grandma is no longer here.

A highlight was an unexpected trip into DC to view ZooLights.

We entered the zoo gate and saw this:

and then this:

and this:

and then this:

and I happily stood and posed with my daughter here:

Now I plan to make a visit to ZooLights my new routine. Somehow unexpected fun helps accept the unexpected changes of the season.

 

New Sport Discovered

“What is that?” I interrupted my daughter who was telling me about her new job as we took a walk in her new Brooklyn neighborhood. I was pointing to the playing field across the street at Prospect Park. And I was thinking,  That is the craziest sport I had ever seen.”

Similar to a soccer game – 2 teams, 2 goals, 2 refs, and a ball. Yet, so crazy looking with the players moving inside a giant bubble! “Who thinks up this kind of stuff up?”

I showed my husband this picture once I returned home and his curiosity led him to send me an email from work on Monday that read:

Turns out it’s a thing.  You have to watch this video:  Soccer is even more fun in a bubble

 

When I forwarded his email with my daughter, she replied with this email:

Check it out: http://bubbleballsoccernyc.com/    Pick-up games are $65 PER PERSON!

 Now that I discovered a new sport called Bubble Soccer, any takers to join the next pick-up game?? I know where we can find one in Brooklyn!! Or maybe we all start a league in our hometown!