As Betsy suggested on Day 5, I took my March 4th small moment:
In Venice, laundry seems to be more than just a chore. It seems to be a work of art. First, it is pinned and moved along the pulley line to form a perfect composition. As each piece is hung, a piece never drops by accident or comes loose and falls to the sidewalk or canal below. Then, as it hangs, one piece next to another, a pattern is created. Like a border painted inside a room for decoration, a Venetian’s clean clothing decorates a building’s facade. Laundry Day brightens up the neighborhood!
I pulled out some words, some phrases.
I wrote as a poem:
Venetian laundry
More than just a chore
It hangs as a work of art
One piece next to another
Pinned along the pulley line
Above the walkways and canals
A colored pattern created
Against a stucco canvas
Venetian laundry
Decorating a building’s facade
Brightening up the neighborhood
A perfect composition
Thanks, Betsy!!
Writing Stories by Sally 
Both pieces of writing work well! I love the shape the poem took, centered on the page. Save this post as a great compare/ contrast lesson in prose vs. poetry!
LikeLike
Both pieces of writing work well! I love the shape the poem took, centered on the page. Save this post as a great compare/ contrast lesson in prose vs. poetry!
LikeLike
What a neat poem you created! Glad you tried out the exercise. I loved the ending line.
LikeLike
I love this idea. I really like the paragraph too. They are both very well put together.
LikeLike
I loved your word choice because it so clearly helped me visualize this scene. The poem has more impact because it makes the scene stay with me longer. Well done!
LikeLike
I really loved this – the exercise and the final poem. Now – it does make me a little more depressed to do my own laundry today though!
LikeLike
What a great poem. I liked the image of the laundry as a work of art:
Venetian laundry
More than just a chore
It hangs as a work of art
In the first piece there was something that reminded me of my own laundry hanging one particularly clear blue sky day. . . I think it was, well, the whole thing, I could almost smell the clean laundry reading this. . .-Amy
LikeLike
What a great poem. I liked the image of the laundry as a work of art:
Venetian laundry
More than just a chore
It hangs as a work of art
In the first piece there was something that reminded me of my own laundry hanging one particularly clear blue sky day. . . I think it was, well, the whole thing, I could almost smell the clean laundry reading this. . .-Amy
LikeLike
You did it! I appreciated reading your first draft and then the crafting of the poem. I think the poem makes the imagination work harder — I had such a visual of the laundry hanging in the streets. Beautiful!
LikeLike
I love this idea. I really like the paragraph too. They are both very well put together.
LikeLike
The poem really works. What great imagery.
LikeLike
Who would have thought laundry can be so beautiful!
LikeLike
This is great! What a great way to use Betsy's work as a mentor text.
LikeLike
The original (Prose) is sooo good. It reads like a prose poem.
Both work well.'
Great snapshot.
LikeLike
YES!!
LikeLike
YES!!
LikeLike
YES!!
LikeLike
This is great, Sally! I love the image of the laundry hanging like works of art. Richard Wilbur wrote a stunning poem that begins with laundry: http://www.poetryfoundation.org/poem/171793
Thanks for sharing your poem!
LikeLike